The Archer and his Lady
by Dungeonwriter
Summary: A series of sweet OrihimeUryu fluffy drabbles! Ryuuken tries to interfere. Doesn't work too well.
1. Listen up!

A Series of Orihime/Ishida drabbles, just for some sweetness. In no apparent order.

Listen Up!

Orihime did love her Uryu. He was brave and smart and kind and he worshipped the ground she walked on. He put her first above everything and he made her feel that she was the most important person in the world.

But he had a few bad habits, and one was not listening very well to his father. Uryu couldn't even hear the things his father was trying to say when he was talking.

When Dr. Ishida said "You're weak," he was trying to say he worried about Uryu and wanted to protect him but he also wanted to make him strong.

When the good doctor said being a Quincy didn't make money, he was saying he wanted Uryu to have the best of everything, to have a good and comfortable life without struggling or fighting, he wanted Uryu to be rewarded for his efforts.

And when he said Uryu had no talent, what he was really saying was "I know what's out there. You can't defend yourself against every evil. And I can't lose you."

It was really simple. Dr. Ishida liked to put up a stern front and he was hard on Uryu. But anyone with eyes could see how much he loved his son.

Maybe Uryu's glasses were foggy and that was why he missed those subtle messages. She'd have to clean them for him.

-Fin-

More to come!


	2. Presents

_Another story for you all. Thank you who reviewed, you few but fateful. I really appreciate and it's for you I update. This is how they got together. _

Orihime had always loved birthdays. Tatsuki and she would go out for ice cream and Orihime would always pick the most delicious flavor, like butter-scotch mixed with strawberries and sweet potatoes. Tatsuki would then present her with a modest but thoughtful gift, like a new book. She would open the politely affectionate cards from her relatives, who would always offer to come let her visit them, so they could spoil her in person.

But she had not expected a neatly wrapped ivory clored package placed at her front door. A delicate note had been pinned to it, written in the most delicate and elegant calligraphy. "For you. Many happy returns of the day," she read, wondering what the gift contained. It could be a crazy person, or space aliens or a gift from the ghosts. A quick call to Tatsuki confirmed that no lunatic would spend the money on such expensive wrapping and paper. "So just open it."

Orihime did as she was told, opening the blue satin ribbons that imprisoned her beautiful present. She couldn't imagine what treasures lay inside. Like cookies or butterflies or something she hadn't even thought of.

As she peeled away the layers, she gasped in shock. It was a dress, but not just any dress…but a dress like the ones actresses wore to award ceremonies.

She held it up, wondering when this wonderful gift would disappear and she would wake up from her dream. It was an off the shoulder full-length silk gown, in the most beautiful shade of violet imaginable. It was like a million perfect plums had sacrificed their color to this lovely dress. A narrow skirt completed the look, with a generous slit to allow her to walk.

Could it have been Kurosaki-kun who gave her this? She didn't know where he'd get the money for something like this, but she would be so happy if he had found some way of actually thinking of her enough to give her this. Tatsuki would never give her something like this and her relatives weren't the mysterious gift type. So it had to be her Ichigo.

That was till she noticed the small scroll in the pocket. "On November 19th, at the hour of six, Inoue Orihime is cordially invited to attend the Hospital Charity Ball hosted by Ms. Daichi Suzu at the adress of ... Black tie attire," she read the elegantly printed information.

Underneath was a hand written message in a flawlessly written calligraphy. "Would you care to attend?"  
----------------------  
On November 19th, Orihime, her hair elegantly coifed, snuggled into the beautiful gown arrived at the house in the wealthiest area of town. Reporters were waiting to snap pictures and Orihime wondered if all the flashing lights would make the dress float away.

Waiting at the door was a handsome prince. But it wasn't the one she would expect it to be. Of course…she should have known, the clues were all there…but she hadn't ever considered…she didn't even know if he liked girls…

"You…came," he said, fidgeting nervously in his beautiful white clothing, looking like an angel.

"Of course I came. Thank you for inviting me," Orihime whispered, completely shocked. "I'm so happy to be here."

"Really?" Ishida-kun asked, looking so happy to see her that she could melt.

"Yes. The dress was perfect," Orihime said, blushing to the roots of her hair. "It was just what I wanted. I just…didn't know."

"Inoue-san…would you care to dance?" Ishida-kun asked, bowing over her hand and kissing it delicately.

Orihime was too enchanted to notice the rest of the ball. It was all coming together so perfectly. "I…would."

As they walked into the party together, Orihime felt every eye on her. But when they danced, Orihime noticed the Quincy could only see her.

---

---

Please review, they help me write faster!


	3. Silk

A Portrait in Silk

From the depths I called out to you. Come to me  
Upon your return, the light will return to my eyes  
I'm not finished, I'm not leaving the touch of your hands  
May it come and light up to the sound of your laughter

---Idan Raichel "From the Depths"

"Ishida…you must do this," Orihime said, determined to take her friend along on this scheme if she had to carry him over her shoulder. He was awfully skinny and cute, it would be like having a pet Quincy, which would be a very good pet, since there was only two of them left and Dr. Ishida didn't look like a very good pet.

"Please, Inoue, I don't want to. What's the point?" Ishida asked, not looking at her directly. His cheeks had reddened when he spoke to her. He had no reason to be embarrassed of his sewing, sewing was such a manly and wonderful habit. She didn't know why he was so shy about it.

"Vogue is sponsoring new designers. You could get a full scholarship to America to study with some of the greatest designers in the world. Or you could win the door prize, a free trip to Italy to tour the countryside. And you could see the leaning tower of Pizza," Orihime said, her eyes sparkling at the thought of a mile high tower of delicious cheese and pepperoni. She would start from one side and not stop eating. Maybe she'd invite friends and have a party!

"You mean Piza?" Ishida asked, his eyes widening. "I think it's a little bit different, less edible and more edifice. Though a lot of pizza would be nice." He smiled and handed her a small pillow he had monogrammed with her name on it. "This is for you."

Ordinarly, she would have been fooled by that tricky Quincy to distract her, but nothing would get her off her goal. Orihime removed a beautiful purple dress from the wall. It was an empire-cut sleeveless cotton that just flowed so beautifully. "If you don't show the world your talent, then I'll be very upset." She watched him stare at his shoes. No one could make clothing like him. "I really love your work. And I love the pillow. So please, do it for me."

Ishida stared at her for a moment, and smiled. "Agreed. If you model for me, I'll agree to submit a piece. No one else can wear this dress properly but you," he said, gesturing for the bathroom. "Go try it on so I can make some adjustments."

As Orihime tried it on, she noticed how well it fit her. It was almost like it was made for her measurements. But that would mean that Ishida had been thinking of her when he made something so beautiful. That would be impossible.

-----

The event had gone well. Everyone had applauded when Orihime had scampered down the aisle, enjoying how the dress flowed around her. She was like a doll, all the better to show Ishida's fashion. So in some ways, she was wearing Ishida…but being more modest.

Still, all the people staring at her did make her uncomfortable. Because of her big chest, men all thought she was some kind of toy. But she wasn't, she was a person and if they looked past her chest, they'd see her heart. Then she wasn't sure if they would like her.

"A stunning newcomer, Ishida Uryu is displaying his new line, Quincy Designs. A stunning French Cotton in plum, this empire waist dress was hand sewn to emphasize a woman with elegant curves. This stunning creation is suited to any event, formal party or work event." A sea of blurry faces and lights stared out before her and Orihime had to force herself not to blink and just to smile and keep walking.

She recognized a familiar spiritual pressure and was happy to notice Dr. Ishida was there in the audience. She knew that he would be hiding his presence from Ishida younger but it was still nice of him to come and see his son's work. Even if he was cold…Ishida was lucky to have him. She would have liked to see Sora again, just for a minute.

Before she knew it, her thoughts had nearly sent her tumbling off the catwalk. She quickly turned around and marched back, hoping no one had noticed she wasn't paying attention.

Backstage, Ishida was looking wonderful in his Quincy robes. He looked happier than he normally looked. "Everyone loved it," he breathed, looking absolutely shocked. "Did you hear that applause?"

"Yes. You should be very proud of yourself," Orihime said, giving Ishida a shy smile. She loved seeing her friends happy; it was one of her greatest joys. She knew in her heart that Ishida would win, no other entry had come close to the incredible talent the Quincy had. She couldn't wait to get pictures from Italy. "You're the best. I just hope I did you justice."

"Of course you did. You made the show," Ishida explained, his glasses hiding his eyes. "Why are you thanking me? All I did was get you up on stage. You did the rest. This dress made you so magical and strong."

Orihime laughed nervously. "I…have no idea what you mean. I just did you a favor, nothing more. I think you should have picked someone better." Someone small and slim and elegant.

"You are so beautiful," Ishida whispered, giving her a shy smile. "Didn't you see all eyes were on you?" he asked, taking her hand and shaking it. "Thank you for making my show such a success. I could not have done this without you."

Orihime laughed nervously. "It was just because of the dress. I'm nothing special," she answered, wondering if Ishida needed better glasses. She looked like a stick with two water melons strapped on for size. She wasn't small and dainty and delicate like a certain shinigami. "It's all because of your talent that everyone liked the dress," she assured him.

"How could you say that? You're the third in our class. You're a black belt in Karate. You're a healer who helps people. And you are beautiful. Your hair, your eyes, your smile. No one was looking at the dress," Ishida whispered. "I wasn't."

Orihime could feel her heart beating in her chest. This was turning out far differently than she thought it would. Ishida couldn't love her. No one loved her that way. Least of all, Ishida who was so pure and quiet and nice that he could never love a weird girl like her. "You're…being silly." Besides, she loved Ichigo. And she knew…someday he would love her in return, if she just waited long enough. This was just too much, too soon.

"Yes…you're right," Ishida said, turning pink. He bowed deeply in gratitude. "I don't know what I was thinking. I apologize," he assured her in a kind tone. "I hope I did make you uncomfortable."

He was so polite and nice. Orihime felt herself color with shame that she had hurt his feelings. "No, the fault was mine," she chirped, trying to fumble for the right thing to say to him to make him feel better.

She had hoped something would be said, but both just concentrated on their shoes, leaving only an awkward silence between them

Happily, it was broken in a wonderful way. "We have had some talented entries, ladies and gentlemen, but one entry truly stood out from the rest. Winner of the Vogue Challenge, Ishida Uryu, of Quincy Designs. Please get on the stage and take a bow so you can claim your prize."

Orihime squealed happily. "You won!" Not only did it make her less uncomfortable but now the whole world would know what a talented friend she had.

Ishida bowed again. "Thank you for all your help," he said, giving her a strange smile. "I will send you many gifts from Italy." He did look happy, but there was still a tinge of sadness in his voice before he walked out of the curtains and the crowd began to roar approval.

"Mr. Ishida, you have won a trip to America to study with the Fashion Institute of Technology, on a full scholarship. Staying at the beautiful dorms, you will learn fashion secrets from the best in the industry. And at the end of the three years, you will return to Japan to put on a full fashion show of your collection."

Orihime knew she had done the right thing. So why did she have tears running down her cheeks? He would be going away for three whole years and he would forget her and he had no idea what it mattered if he went away, because she wasn't allowed to love him, she had to love Ichigo and if she didn't, well, than she would be very confused. And that would be a very bad thing. But if she didn't do something, Ishida would go away and forget her and she would be so miserable.

"Thank you so much," Ishida was saying, talking about the fabrics he had used to create the model. And he was being very boring, but so cute about it. He had no idea what to say, he hadn't even prepared a speech. And Ishida was always prepared. That was what she loved…she meant liked about him.

"And let's not forget his beautiful model. Please come out and introduce yourself," the announcer said, as Orihime lurched forward. She had no idea what to say, she hadn't prepared anything. She had no idea what she should say about herself, and she only had seconds to decide.

"My name is Inoue Orihime and I'm his girlfriend," she said, pointing at a shocked Ishida. She could not imagine why he was blushing so badly. She figured he would be happy to hear the news, even if half of Karakura Town was watching. He shouldn't look so shocked.

He had said the dress would make her strong.


	4. Renji

Renji to the Rescue 

**Dedicated to SasuSaku1015, to prove I can update quickly. But yeah, these are more "when inspiration hits me" type drabbles. **

"You like her," Renji said in an accusing tone. He had been enjoying messing with the Quincy's mind while on stake-out. It helped passed the time and it was better than playing cards. Teasing uptight geeks was as good as it got.

Seeing the puffed up fashion addict bristle and push his glasses up his nose was definitely amusing. "I have no idea what you are speaking of." His tone was clipped, formal and furious. Perfect.

"Oh don't lie to me. What do you like about her? Is it that tight ass? That long hair? Those bouncing boobs that just move with her? I mean, the entire package is good, I just want to know what made you decide to take up women," Renji queried. He had always considered Ishida someone who would be more attracted to a more…different source than a woman. But he supposed that if a captain who favored women also used cherry blossoms as a bankai, anything was possible.

"Say one more word against her honor and you'll find yourself wishing you had never been born," Ishida said, his left eye visibly twitching. The typical chivalry of a Quincy, unable to tolerate an insult against a female. It was kind of sweet, in a pathetic, archaic way. Where he came from, women could defend themselves without men stepping in and making it all better.

"Cool it, Ishida. I'm just saying, it's okay to like her. I'd surely like to tap her. So why are you so ashamed about being in love with her?" Renji demanded, half at himself. He loved someone as well…and had never told her that she made his world. He had let her go, thinking it had been the right choice. And each day, it sucked just a little bit more.

"It's none of your business. Now can we please concentrate on the matter at hand?" Ishida demanded, a vein pulsating in his forehead as his glasses hid his eyes. Renji was getting to him, he could feel it.

"I know you're not muscular and good looking like me. I know that it's scary to put your heart out and have it broken. But you aren't that bad, some girls may like the scrawny fashion obsessed look," Renji soothed.

"You're insane. I am giving you a final warning," Ishida hissed, and his spiritual pressure tensed. Renji was wondering when the guy would finally snap and admit he was madly in love with this girl. Maybe he was afraid. That was something Renji could understand all too well.

"Look, just take it from me. Don't wait to tell her. Because if you do, she'll find someone else and you'll spend the rest of your life kicking yourself. I don't care if you end up alone, but I just thought you should get the advice," Renji explained, trying to be sympathetic. "But if you don't like her, just say so. I'll go for her myself. I prefer dark hair, but I'm always in for a change." It was a low blow, but this guy was too uptight to respond to anything but intense ribbing.

"You lay one hand on the woman I love and I swear…," Ishida snapped, his bow out and ready to shoot him into oblivion. Renji wasn't entirely nervous, but he didn't particularly like sharp, pointy objects pointed at him, especially when he was trying so hard to help.

"I thought I said, cool it. You don't want Inoue hearing you threatening me so soon after you told her you loved her?" he demanded, pointing to his communicator which had a light blinking, hooked up to Rukia's communicator, who was having a tea party with a certain bosomy healer.

The look on Ishida's face was worth the entire effort.


	5. Sugar and Spice

_title:_ Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice..  
_genre:_ Fluff  
_rating:_ PG  
_time line:_ In the future  
_pairing:_ Ishihime  
_word count:_ 2100

Ishida Ryuuken was a model of what a proper man should be. He was a top ranked doctor, one of the finest in Japan and a world renowned expert in his field. He was a wealthy man who had founded his own hospital where people constantly came to marvel at his genius. He kept no personal life, endowing all of his talent to science.

He was also a handsome man. He eat a strict vegetarian diet, maintaining a properly muscular physical apperance and his bodily functions were at peak. He kept his schedule rigorous, his personal life austure and his body functioning at peak.

He admitted he lacked perfection in his personal life. According to the world's view, his wife had died mysteriously, and he had no relationship with his rebellious son. He had tried to make a strong boy out of him, but the stubborn fool had persisted in being difficult. Still, Ishida Ryuuken had been a model of proper discipline.

Then came Inoue Orihime who had the ability to turn everything upside down. First, she came without money, breeding or class. Her parents had been wastrals and she lived alone. She giggled innapropriately, babbled when she should remain quiet and no ability to conduct herself as the girlfriend of the heir to Ryuuken's vast fortune. She wanted to earn her own way, she wanted to enjoy life, she wanted to be independent. But that he could forgive.

Then she had encouraged his son to leave medicine and become a fashion designer. It was true that his boy had become an enormous success and taking in enormous amount of money as he had become the darling personal stylist to the stars. It was completely unmanly. How could any heterosexaul male become so…effeminate? But that he could forgive.

Then she had gotten it into her head that getting her claws into his heir wasn't enough. She had to bond with him. Ryuuken didn't bond. He prefered to have interns live in terrror of him and his investors in awe of him. He had no need of her endless meals brought to his office, the muffin baskets delivered cheerily to his office, her endless questions about how he was feeling. That he could forgive.

But he could not forgive the Sunday dinners at the apartment those two crazy children, when she had insisted he come and refused to leave until he had given his word that he would attend. And instead of properly austure traditional Japanese food, she made French breads and rich creamy Italian sauces and thick cookies called Rugulak, which she claimed was a tradtional recipe from a pen pal in Louisana. Each of the meals was more than his caloric needs for a month. And he couldn't stop himself from consuming every morsal, it was so delicious. That he could not forgive at all.

When he looked in the mirror, he was distressed to see his formally svelve physique melt into this geriatric model of an old man, something he had sworn would never happen to him. He hoped to be hit by a car before his waistline expanded.

"Isn't she wonderful?" Uryuu kept saying, completely lovesick over her, acting without a shred of dignity or self discipline.

He also couldn't forgive his son's snide remarks when he reminded him of that fact. "So, Father, am I having a new sister or brother?" Uryuu asked impudently, pointing at his once flat stomach, which might have bulged out slightly more than he would have liked.

Ryuuken's lip curled. He remembered a time when his son had been respectful and obedient. Of course, that changed once Uryuu was too big to go across Ryuuken's lap, a terrible trick of nature that allowed sons to grow up and actually be able to kill their father's through high blood pressure caused by rampent isolence and idiocy. "I don't recall asking your opinion. Perhaps the fat has gone to your already thick head?" he said, giving his son a death glare.

"At least my hair isn't white and falling out. Soon you'll be a fat old man, an old grandpa sitting in a rocking chair," Uryuu said, looking quite pleased with himself. 'You are no longer as young as you used to be. You should rest, take it easy, enjoy what's left of your old bones."

"I will ignore your childish behavior, you idiotic excuse for a son," Ryuuken said with dignity. "You don't have the talent to insult me, considering you're a frills outfitter for a living. No better than a woman. And the cooking is catching up with you too, I don't remember you having a bosom."

Uryuu's eyes narrowed. "You're just a washed old man who is too bitter to even be polite. That glare won't frighten me anymore," he said, putting another piece of poundcake into his mouth defiently.

"Is that your knees knocking or is it just the flab?" Ryuuken asked icily. "You have no discipline. I have always told you that, but nothing ever gets through to that thick head of yours."

"So why do you keep coming?" Uryuu asked snidly. Ryuuken wondered if he still had that wooden spoon he had once used. Uryuu had always been much better behaved under strict discipline. "Is it just your deep affection for me?" he asked.

Now that was a low blow, if he ever heard one. "If you'll excuse me," Ryuuken said. "I would like to step outside for a smoke." He didn't actually indulge in the vice, but it was an excellent last resort to getting out of conversations he couldn't glare his way out of.

Of course, he had the other vice. The vice of being truly willing to die for his son, actually feeling a burning affection that made anything else in his life seem trivial. He had never thought having that dark haired plump little infant put into his arms would make him well up with emotions he had never felt before. He remembered standing by his son's bed, watching that little chest rise and fall and feeling irritating tears falling down his cheeks. If it was possible, he would have locked his son away from the world entirely.

But that would be a disservice. He would not spoil his son and ruin him forever. He would make him strong for the world. He would not be selfish and allow this boy to waste his potential, just to make the relationship stronger. That would not be prudant.

He had been harsh. He had sacrificed much. He had shown discipline and restraint and he supposed that his methods had worked…mostly. And any mistakes had been Uryuu's fault entirely.

"You know, he has your spirit," a voice said, as Ryuuken turned around to see a dark haired Shinigami staring at him, a faint smile on her face. "My little boy has grown up, hasn't he?"

"Good to see you again," Ryuuken said with a formal bow. "You look well, Shingami." She was as beautiful as he remembered and he still felt that familier, unwanted stirring in his loins. He had to remind himself that he didn't love her anymore, he had cauterized his heart.

"You do as well," the Shinigami said. "Our son is happy, isn't he? I sometimes watch over him, when I have enough energy to hide my spiritual pressure. He's grown up so nicely."

Ryuuken smiled, a smile that sent medical residents running for cover in sheer babbling terror. "Yes, he has. I have been a good father to him. I was there when he needed me and I made him strong," he said with pride. "Any flaws can be blamed on you…and him."

The Shinigami nodded. "I think he developed both our loves for sweets," she said with a soft giggle. "His love for pound cake from America he gets from you."

"I suppose he gets some things from me," Ryuuken admitted. "But he has your eyes. I'll grant you that."

"He is a dear boy. He misses me so much. He still lights a candle in front of my alter every day." She seemed quite sure that made up for abandoning them when Uryuu was a small child.

"He lights candles to the woman once called Kato Megumi, not you. As far as he is concerned, you're just another Shinigami. You promised me, Uryuu would be mine. You surrendered all claim to him when you left us," Ryuuken said angrily. She had taken everything when she had left, leaving his life in shambles. He had not forgiven her for that.

"And I agreed. I had to go and you offered to give him the life he deserved. But he is still my son, in my heart. And you are so cold to him," the shinigami said softly, looking miserable. "Is it because he has my eyes?"

"No, it's because he has your heart, a heart that always gets broken because you wear it on your sleeve?" Ryuuken said. "I will protect him from this spiritual realm that destroys life. Better I should break his heart than the world should do so."

"You know why I did it," the Shinigami said with dignity. "I couldn't allow people to know we had a child together. They would kill our son, experiment on him, treat him like an animal."

"You don't have to explain it to me," Ryuuken said softly. He had completely understood. He just wished she hadn't broken his heart in the process. "I am content living apart. I have moved on. I have completely forgotten you. My son is better off without you. You would have only made his life worse."

The Shinigami's smile was as terrifying as a hurricane, something that nearly made him weak in the knees again. "I would not advise you to say such things," she said pleasantly. "I may not have been the perfect mother, but that was beyond my control." The words were said with enough chilling amiability to make himself doubt his own ability to control himself from grabbing her in a passionate kiss. She was still scrumptiouis and beneath that restrained façade was a woman who had made him howl in passion. "I've paid for it, quite dearly. Every single day when he doesn't know my name, I have felt pain."

"You haven't changed," Ryuuken said, taking her hand and kissing it gallently to appease her. "You've always been a force of nature."

"Well, you have changed," his former wife said softly. "You're softer."

"It's all muscle. Just because that crazy daughter in law of mine thinks butter is a needed ingrediant in everything doesn't mean I have gained weight," Ryuuken said irritably.

His former wife laughed. "I didn't mean it that way, and you knew it," she said. "You've always been a prickly mortal," she teased him. "I suppose that it's why you never remarried. You couldn't find another woman willing to put up with you."

"And you? Did you find yourself a new person?" Ryuuken asked, wondering if he wanted to know the answer. The thought of her in love with someone else displeased him.

"I've had offers, you know. But I have my work and that's enough for me," his former wife said. "I've lived many lifetimes, and had gotten used to being alone." She held her head high as she held out her hand. "As you did."

"There was never anyone who could fill your place," Ryuuken allowed, taking her hand. She was one of a kind.

"I love you, Ryuuken. No matter what, over all the lifetimes, I have known many men but…it's you I have always loved," she said, before fading away. "And someday, we will be together again."

And Ryuuken sighed. "Retsu-chan…" he said softly. "Until then." How bothersome she was, stirring up his feelings and making him all lovesick like his foolish son. He was supposed to be above that.

He wouldn't forgive his lover for breaking his heart. He wouldn't forgive his son for breaking his heart. And he wouldn't forgive his soon to be daughter in law for the pain she would one day cause, somehow.

But he was beginning to realize he had no choice but accept reality, the reality that seemed to overtake his neatly made world and leave him feeling actual emotion, the thing he kept trying to escape.

"Dr. Ishida, dessert is ready," said the girl who had stolen the next Ishida's heart, the same kind of strange and illogical beauty that melted cold hearts and made them wonder what they were thinking.

He would have to have some more pound cake and ponder this.


	6. And Everything Nice!

**Part two of the Ryuuken torture! He's so much fun to write and so much fun to annoy! I just think it would be hilarious to have him try to talk with Orihime. **

And Everything Nice!

"You know, your food is too rich," Ishida Ryuuken said, trying to instruct his future daughter in her most important duty, keeping the head of the house happy. "I think Uryuu would benefit from a more Spartan regime."

"Sparta, like Italy?" Inoue said, brightly. 'I can make pancetta for him, and fettuccini and all those delicious mozzarella I can use for him!"

"No, he needs simple food. He's growing lazy and indolent," Dr. Ishida explained patiently. He had been told this child had graduated third in the class and was a star athlete. He was starting to wonder what morons his son had attended school with.

"Yes, I do like to spoil him," Inoue said, giggling. 'I like him to be all content and happy when he gets home from work. He's a big celebrity and he needs to keep up his strength."

"On that subject, do you think fashion designer is a proper profession for a man?" Dr. Ishida asked, still quite flummoxed by how to say anything to get this girl's attention.

"Oh of course not. It's only suitable for my man, most men don't have the talent my Uryuu has. Or they just don't have the inclination to learn it. I'm sure he got his skills from you, doctor, look how your shirt matches your tie and your pants," she said, and Dr. Ishida was quite sure he would have to proscribe himself a dose of migraine medication before this conversation was through. "You're going to make such a good grandpa."

"Miss Inoue, I think we need to have a serious and frank discussion," Dr. Ishida began, before he felt a terrible sensation around his arms. This…creature of bubbles and froth had just hugged him! This unwanted body contact was unacceptable.

"Yes. I can't thank you enough for making Uryuu and I so happy. We are so excited to have you in our lives, you're the kindest and most wonderful father in the whole world, even if Uryuu says you're not, I know he's lying," the emotionally diuretic girl sobbed, pressing her wet face into his neatly pressed shirt.

"Miss Inoue," Dr. Ishida said, trying to break into the conversation. "I think you should know…"

"That you feel the same way? That I'm like the daughter you always wanted? I can't believe you are so good to me, you're such a wealthy important man and I know I'm not the girl you wanted for him, you wanted a girl with class, but you gave me such a wonderful chance and I won't let you down." Miss Inoue was not hearing the words he was trying to say.

"Miss Inoue," Dr. Ishida tried again, as he felt another hug coming, something completely against all the rules he lived his life by.

"And we'll take care of you, Uryuu and I. You'll eat by our home every single day. I'll make you delicious proper home cooked meals. I'll even bring you food at the hospital, I can come visit you at lunch,"

That was unacceptable. "Miss Inoue," Dr. Ishida said, realizing he was quickly losing control of the situation.

"Oh, don't bother thanking me. It's my pleasure. You're family, we want to take care of you. When you're old, we'll take care of you, keep you nice and warm and taken care of. And you can babysit the grandchildren and take them to the park and sing to them. We're going to be one big wonderful family."

Dr. Ishida was quite sure that this was some terrible vengeance against him by some furious deity of sorts. As he saw his son walk in and start smirking, he was more than sure that someone in the heavens hated him. And as he regarded himself as Master of the Universe around him, this was even more distressing.

"I'm going to make you some more cake," Inoue said happily, letting go of him. "And we can all sing along to my favorite music after dinner."

Dr. Ishida was quite sure the world had gone mad. As his future daughter in law, half of the genetic make up of the future of his line began to sing loudly from Andrew Llyod Weber, he was starting to realize that he had not landed a single sarcastic remark, he had allowed everything to happen and had not stopped it.

He realized with even more horror that he had cut himself a piece of cake. He had done it, he had succumbed to his worst fears. He had gotten old and soft!

Uryuu grinned and said nothing. He didn't have to.

**Part Three is ready and will be up within the week! And yes, Uryuu's revenge is sweet. **


End file.
